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Oknum yang Budiman

Anggota Masyarakat 1: Mau ke mana, Cak? Anggota Masyarakat 2: Mau ke kecamatan, ngurus sertifikat hak milik buat tanah yang saya beli tahun lalu, Cak. Anggota Masyarakat 1: Minta berapa Pak Camat? Anggota Masyarakat 2: Wah, pak camatnya sejak awal bilang kalau kita tak perlu bayar apa-apa selain…

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Mentalitas Sampah

Yanto: Ini, Pak, mau ngurus surat keterangan kematian. Pak Lurah: Buat almarhum abah, ya Mas? Yanto: Nggih, Pak. Ibuk mau ngurus pengalihan pensiunnya Bapak. Pak Lurah: Oh iya. Saya lihat dulu. Tapi sudah lengkap, sesuai petunjuknya Pak Marto, kan? Yanto: Nggih, Pak. Sudah semua… Monggo dipirsani dulu. Pak…

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The Preaching We–I mean ‘I’–Believe

Man: Feel free to come to the mosque in the evening. We have dinner every night during ramadhan. Friend Girl: You’re not proselytizing me, right? Man: Haha… We’re not preaching to others who hold their own beliefs. Friend Girl: You don’t preach to others? Man: Well, the only…

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‘I believe in the philosophy [that] the United States is a corporation,’ [Osama Siblani] said. ‘You need to buy shares in order to have influence.’ [The Arab-American News, the newspaper that Siblani founded] would be his investment. Barrett, Paul M. American Islam: The Struggle for the Soul of…

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Puasa 2.0

Misdi: Halo, Om. Nanti sore kalau ke masjid aku bareng ya? Sastro: Wah, bos. Aku gak puasa hari ini. Sungkan mau ikut makan di masjid. Misdi: Wah, sakit apa bos? Sastro: Nggak sakit-sakit apa gitu sih… Tadi pagi gak sahur. Misdi: Lha kan tempo hari sudah–berapa hari?–dua hari…

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Selamat berbuka puasa…

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Fake Walmart Smile

Misdi: … , so that’s why I returned. Walmart Associate 1: Well, that’s actually your own responsibility young man. Misdi: So why did you put that thing there in the first place if eventually you blame us for its glitches? (Tiba-tiba dari belakang terdengar.) Customer: Howye doing, Cathy?…

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Bill Clinton’s 1993 Cadillac Fleetwood (photo taken by yours truly at Clinton Presidential Museum, Little Rock, AR)

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This Is an Emergency

Abu Saddam: … so, you can please express your condolence and show your sympathy to brother Nasheed. Orang Berbaju Kotak2: Excuse me brother. This is an emergency… (wajahnya terlihat separuh puas, karena sudah lama dia berdiri di depan jamaah, menunggu Abu Saddam menyelesaikan pengumuman.) Abu Saddam: Brother… Orang…

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A Lion Sign

Anak: Daddy… (dengan wajah bangun tidur, muncul di depan pintu kamar kerja bapak.) Bapak: Mau apa, le? Pipis ta? Anak: I want to drink. Bapak: (Meninggalkan meja kerja dan mengikuti anak ke dapur.) Anak: (Terlihat kaget waktu lampu ruang tamu, di antara kamar tidur dan dapur, dinyalakan.) What…